Living in Limbo 

Today, I managed to go to campus and tkae care of a few things, not the least of which is a making an appointment for tomorrow afternoon. I need to talk with the doctor about increasing my medication if it is possible or advisable to do so. I only spent about twenty minutes waiting to see the triage nurse to discuss why I needed to see a doctor. For some reason, the student health center was packed with sick people: one had a pretty rough cough, and another had "pink eye." I know this because one of the nurses mentioned it to the staff at the front desk, and everyone overheard (about seven students.) I guess privacy about one's health is not something that students really have as much as older patients might. Generally, students are a pretty healthy lot anyway, and they don't have much experience with clinics anyway. Therefore, if one of the clinic staff mentions, in a rather loud voice, that "Richard" has "mono," Richard is not likely to complain about it.

Another minor success for today--I did some grocery shopping. I bought some hot dogs, tea, and chicken. I would like to go to Costco sometime to buy some stuff for the freezer, but to be honest, I am not sure if I am going to have to move in a couple of weeks or not, so stocking the freezer now might be a pointless exercise. I've been thinking about getting a job, about moving to another apartment, or about moving back in with my parents temporarily. Money is getting low, and school options are running out. I am still not sure what I need to do at this point, but I am fairly certain that I will know more by the end of the week.

03 April 2006


Okay, so the optimism of the previous post might have been a little premature. I haven't accomplished much since Wednesday except catching up on too many naps. I am almost out of cash, and I needed to have written two fifteen page papers a month ago. I've lost my confidence, enthusiasm, and motivation for doing the work in the face of the failure to have done it before. And, I am not too sure what to do about it other than to keep trying until circumstances force a change.

Night Driving

Last Friday, I went for a drive around town looking at apartments that I might want to rent. (For a couple of reasons, I have to move out of the place I'm currently in, regardless of whether I have money or a job.) There seemed to be a nice place--sort of secluded, near the river and a park. It is very unlikely that I will move over there, but it was nice to think about it while I was looking. Of course, I don't want to paint too bleak a picture. There are some things I can do, and I am going to try and do a few of them tomorrow. The inertia of the moment feels like it is dragging me down a little bit, but I know I can work against it. As the cliche goes, tomorrow is another day.